welcome to the shit show
Rona has given me the wonderful opportunity to be at home with all five of my lovely children! Just want to share how it’s been going... Much to the horror of my oldest daughter, she’s had to move back home from college. I went outside to help her unload her things as she pulls into the driveway on two wheels. When she opens her door I’m hit with the overpowering smell of skunk.... skunky ass weed, that is! Oh, and she’s the proud new owner of a skanky little tattoo. Now I know where the money we so generously give her each week is going.... For some reason my 17 year old is not able to understand this whole “shelter-in-place” order... but the one thing she is so very sure of is the “fact” that I’m deliberately ruining her life by making her stay home while all her friends are still hanging out. I’m pretty sure there’s been a breakup with her boyfriend thrown in the mix... ultimately that’s my fault too because I wouldn’t let her see him. There’s been lots of slamming doors and yelling and tears. My 16 year has completely changed his sleep/wake patterns. He has been starting his day around 10 pm and conveniently ending it shortly after the rest of the family wakes up each day. Although he’s too sweet to say it, I know he does this so he doesn’t have to witness the daily shit show the rest of us are privy too. Smartest kid in the bunch if you ask me! My 8 year old and 4 year old have become quite proficient with curse words and they’ve had daily fist fights. The four year old is a little beast. They also stood in the driveway facing the road (as cars passed by) and had a pissing contest... when I realized what they were doing I yelled at them... the four year old turned back to look at me when I started yelling and pissed on his brother., which resulted in another fist fight! Today my eight year old broke out one of the living room windows with a ball. My Four year old put our dog in a choke hold, which I’m quite disturbed by... oldest daughter made it a point to tell me that harming animals is a sign of becoming a serial killer. WTF! My husband and I have found it next to impossible to have sex while everyone is home. We’ve managed twice— once in the garage and once in the bathroom. Both times it was a race to the “end”... both times he won.