tired
I am a very top level social person. I work a customer service job in a local social service agency. I thrive on helping people. I run very emotionally high happy. Service to others is the one thing that makes me happy. At work I feel appreciated and needed.
Now I'm in week 2 of lockdown with my husband of 26 years who is in constant chronic pain and barely leaves the couch and does not talk, an adult daughter with developmental disabilities who also doesn't want to do anything but sleep, eat, watch screens and make messes she just walks away from, a young adult son who is on his computer constantly playing games with friends and if he has more than 30 minutes for me at dinner it's big. And to top it all off, my oldest son has been accused by neighbors of selling pot at the corner and has called the police on him instead of coming to meet first.
My only light is my last daughter who understands me so well but it's quarantined in her apartment in the city and my oldest son's girlfriend who is with us. But she is still rather new to me so these circumstances are bringing us close in an unusual way. I'm so down and feel so disrespected and unappreciated by so many. I'm still expected to work from home but am struggling greatly. I know God will pull me through but I don't feel worthy. I'm paranoid depressed angry and yet still thankful my problems aren't worse. Which then makes me feel guilty for all my bad feelings. I'm so tired.
write your nudes. burn before sending
I broke up with him three weeks ago. I was falling for someone who didn’t seem to know what he wanted out of life but who had made it clear that it wasn’t anything serious with me. The first week I mourned the relationship, the second I got over my hurt feelings, and by the third I decided I wanted him back. We grabbed a drink that last free Saturday and left as friends. Now I’m quarantined in New York with a case of red wine, old memories, and a nagging feeling I let a good thing go too soon. Should I send nudes?
men are gonna men
In the end we all just want someone who chooses us, every time, in any circumstances. Imagine a global pandemic, the man whose been saying he loves you for a year wants you and your daughter at his safer place. A week in he tells at bedtime that his plutonic female sometimes housemate, breaking virus exposure self-isolation to pick up things, is not leaving. He will not take a stand, so you instigate the three person row that ensues, in which she tells a different story. You quickly become the problem and are thrown out with his harshest words and scorn. Hindsight his remarks through the day tell that he knew how it would play out. So hard to straighten the crown and move on, muster the fortitude on all fronts in this challenging time.
all you must hold onto is you, is you, is you
During this pandemic I'm home alone with my three cats. Cant visit my parents or friends but spent 3 days last week w my boyfriend bc he’s also been secluded n it was safe.
Looked forward to this weeks stay with him as I'm going stir crazy, only to wake up to a long long text breaking up with me. He Says due to the virus he’s lost his job and and is worried about the Bill's and cant focus on a romantic relationship, wtf. His next sentence said he was disturbed about our different religious beliefs and cant seem to let our differences go, and after that he said I'm the girl of his dreams but at 53 he needs to step back from me n figure out what he wants In life and right now a girlfriend isn’t it but last week I was the most beautiful, witty, fun, caring sweet girl he’s ever known.
So which damn excuse is it! I'm very confused and extremely sad. If I ever felt alone during this corona thing, at least I had his company and now I have just me and my cats too.
What they say is true. The only thing you can depend on is the love of an animal and yourself. Damn corona, I'm blaming it all on you.
all it takes is a little push
I've been dating this guy for like 2 months now. We met 4 months ago and chatted ever since, but only as friends. Until one day when we actually went dating. Our biggest problem, apparently, at the beginning was ONLY the age gap: he's 13 years older than me. But besides that, we have really connected.
I must be honest, things were pretty weird even since before dating, he seemed a really kind, supportive and talkative person, until one day when he went quiet and I thought I lost him (or better said, I thought he ghosted me). So I went after him and tried to fix the things, as I am that kind of person who wants to see the good in people and who wants to give that one chance needed, in order to build something big. I've said to myself "ok, I'll do my best". So the things seemed actually good afterwards, we started this so-called relationship, first 2-3 weeks were great, he was the man I actually thought I’d like to marry one day, because he was the silence and the calm I so desperately seeked for, since I was a little girl. He was the type of guy that I pictured in my head to be the father of my children: smart, deep, calm, talented, intellectual.
After these great 2-3 weeks, Covid happened.
I've spent like a week at his apartment – we don’t live together, even tho big part of my stuff is at his place.
There the things got weird. From my side, I was really happy that finally we’d had the chance to spend some quality-time together in order to get to know each other and actually to build something stronger than before. But it appeared that the days we've spent together, he was only playing video games.
I was spending most of the time in the other room, working or doing something for myself. We barely talked, we barely laughed, like he didn't enjoy my presence anymore. I felt hurt, I tried to ask what happened and it seems that he only blamed me, my “overthinking side” and my “stupid hurtful jokes” that I make. In the next days, he went all quiet, again. So, I took the decision to go to my place, nearby (right before the total lockdown).
I've been staying here for almost a week and I am fine now (mentally). I could say I am better, because at least I don't see him physically present, but completely emotionally and spiritually absent.
We barely chat now, we approach only shallow topics, that even with strangers I don't discuss. It gives me a bad mood seeing him small-talking to me, as I know that he’s a deep person who seems to have cut off any possibility for us to ever share something deeper than this.
I’ve decided to let things go with the flow, until further notice.
I don't know what the end will be, but I expect this "relationship" to end quietly, smoothly, without a sign or explanation... only fading away.
Maybe Covid fixed the things in my life, better than I was able to.
P.S. I hope this is anonymus.
co-isolation: day 11
Josh’s tummy was making weird noises last night, so I recorded them on my phone to playback so he could hear it too. It was concerning and hilarious at the same time.
thanks for the answers, COVID
My girlfriend and I have been together for over three years. About 6 months ago, she was frustrated from my snoring and after an argument where I was feeling she was pulling away, decided I'd try to compromise and slept on the couch. We were seeing each other for 2-3 times a week which dwindled down to just Saturdays.
Then, COVID hit, and shelter-in-place. She wants to be alone with her and her cat. She was different than any gal I dated. I never had a worry about cheating, she complimented my personality, and thought we would get through everything together. Thanks, COVID, for showing me she isn't who I thought she was, as I've slowly felt over time that she is avoid something, and ultimately, avoiding me, showing me this isn't just I need more space. People who love each other for this long make things work in situations like this, not avoid one another. I can move on now knowing she will always be afraid of commitment. I wish her the very best, but know that if you can't do this together, I'd always be afraid of what would not work together. If you can make it work during this, then you can make it through anything in the future. Thank you for showing that this isn't the case here and I can move on.
coronavirus rules everything around me
Sittin' here listening to Wu Tang Clan. Feeling good knowing that Wu Tang Clan ain't nothing to fuck with. Even for you coronavirus-
why do the stars glow above?
I love a married man, to me he is a perfection I never knew existed and I've never felt this loved. We've been hiding it for 3 years. This Monday he had to take his wife and 2 kids to the countryside to wait out the quarantine and he would've spent the following month with me! - the luxury we never had. The night before she had found out. Now they are divorcing. All of our friends hate us. He ended the relationship with me. The end of the world, and all I can do is to stay home alone.
quarantine day 9
I’m now consoling my friend on how to handle my shitty ex-boyfriend’s ghosting behavior whilst drinking bourbon. What the fuck is happening?
bumbling fool
Met a guy on bumble back in December. We hit off amazingly and have been inseparable until last week. Today he accidentally texted me ‘Just chilling and enjoying this state at home thing.’ Weird because he was supposedly at work today. Logged on bumble and tada he has been active all along. So I did the only thing natural during this time. I ended it via text.
mhm! the guy that played butch cassidy! i know, salad dressings! whodathunk?
My husband won’t stop identifying things OUT LOUD that he recognizes on tv, such as Chicago, or Manhattan, or Bill Murray, or a Ford Pickup. Yes, everyone in the room already knew what that was. You don’t need to tell us. STFU
r.i.p my feelings how do you break up via text?
A week before complete lockdown, the cafe I work at went out of business. Which means even when Covid19s clutches are no longer holding us all back, I will be still out of work.
I told a good friend of mine who I was once secretly and seriously crushing on. She was so empathic and understanding, 'is there anything i can do', and 'I'm always here for you, you know that right?', we talked about it for a while, until I wasn't crying anymore. She even offered to help me financially, despite not earning a large amount of money herself.
When I told my girlfriend, her response was 'yikes'.
puppy love
This morning I asked my partner for reassurance that I am a good dog dad. Ten minutes later she broke up with me stating, “this relationship is too hard for me.” We are currently quarantined together and I’m not really sure how to give her space in this pandemic. Pretty sure my dog still loves me tho.
choose your covid-19 fighter
19yr old introverted male university student - all history lectures are cancelled, for him deciding if he's gonna blast a conspiracy theory podcast or some obscure pretentious history audiobook between the hours of 11am and 2am is the true struggle
15 yr old immunocompromised high school student and barista - the cafe she worked at went out of business a week before lockdown so the remaining money in her bank account is to buy box dye bleach to cope with the current events
vs
the psychologist mother
the mechanic step-dad who is still in work
add in a controlling doomsday prepping biological father whos sweater than said 'the hardest part about an apocalypse would be pretending I'm not excited' isn't as funny anymore, and his out of work(?) nurse girlfriend
heal from what i said or stay mad
My best friend, who I live with, and boyfriend, who I don’t live with, are both still in NYC during “this uncertain time” (or insert any other overly used quarantine/corona-related phrase). I love them both, but with the onslaught of boredom and surplus of wine, I’ve found myself resorting to passive aggressive drunk comments for entertainment on several occasions. Instead of talking things out or addressing these instances, quarantine has us all opting for a “get over it” mentality. So, I love you guys, but while we’re locked up, you’re going to have to heal from what I said or stay mad ❤️
just friends
So i’m isolating with my long distance boyfriend at my place. On a zoom call with friends, he gets asked where he is ... says the east coast (he lives on the west coast) ... when they ask why ... he says he’s staying with “a friend”
And thats how I found out my boyfriend of a year and half is afraid to tell some of his friends and colleagues that we are dating. Thank you rona for this one!
i think i've wanted to break it off longer than i'd like to admit
now i regret not doing it before a F*CKING GLOBAL PANDEMIC AND LOCKDOWN
breaking up with my first girlfriend via text in a global pandemic might be a shitty but cool thing to say when im in my mid twenties, very drunk, and playing never have i ever
but right now its just painful
our whole we-dont-know-how-to-work-relationships-but-we-are-working-it-out-together is not as cute and sweet as it was 10 months ago
im just an immunocompromised teenage girl in a locked down pandemic world
dead to me
My husband (of 15 years) and I are on the verge of conscious uncoupling. We had agreed to give each other space to do our own thing and prioritize ourselves. Then came the shelter in place order. I guess we are giving 'happily married' another shot as there is no way to give each other space while sharing the same space 24/7. A few months of this and we'll either be expecting, divorcing, or one of us will be burying the other in the back yard. Talk about rolling the dice!